Don’t we just all love to watch movies or TV series that feature single girl/boy dates gone wrong. It’s one of my guilty pleasures and I can proudly say that Bridget Jones is my single girl superhero. Her clumsy single girl actions and the way she tackles her status make me laugh and instantly cheer me up. It definitely feels relatable, as I’m quite the notorious single myself.

I can imagine that especially the past holiday season could have been confronting for all the single girls. Whether your aunt asks you for the 5th year in a row if you have a boyfriend or your social media feed is being taken over by lovebirds. It sometimes simply sucks being single. I have to say I have managed to love my status and see the bright side of not being in a relationship. However we single girls need to stick to one another and lift each other’s spirits.

As I enjoy watching and reading about fictional single girl scenarios and especially about those disastrous dates. I thought it be fun to put some of my personal fiascos into writing. Here are a handful of stories with a high dose of awkwardness.

Do I know you?
During a girl’s night out, I spotted a guy at the club. I thought he looked good and started flirting from a distance. It worked as he soon approached me. My girls and me were quite drunk (a shots kind of eve). We danced and kissed and exchanged phone numbers. It didn’t take long before we plan to meet up. First of all, he was late! I don’t like t when people are late. Punctuality is key, especially on a date. All of the sudden I see this random guy waving in my direction. My instant reaction was that I looked behind me to see whom this individual was waving to. Only to see that there was nobody behind me! Then he said my name a couple of times so it hit me. That’s him! He didn’t look like the guy I had in mind. Thank you, alcohol. Oh well, let’s give it a go. It was so weird. I didn’t feel any connection to whatever he was saying, but on the other hand I couldn’t do anything wrong in his eyes and for him all was going so well apparently. At one point he leaned towards me and said, give me a kiss. I had this ‘EW GO AWAY pure panic look’ on my face but he didn’t catch neither of my signals. Luckily I managed to escape the kiss and left with the excuse that my friend had send me a message that she was feeling ill and throwing up so I should go see her. We obviously didn’t meet up again.

Double date – Risotto as a starter
The double date phenomenon exists to hook up a friend with someone and to make a date easy going, comfortable and not so tensed. The best part is that you have a friend with you that can read signals and you can decide a code for when things are bad.
During this date, both my friend and me didn’t really know the guys we were meeting up with as we had just met them one time before. They were also friends, which made it much easier, we thought. The plan was to meet up for drinks. They looked good, the hipster type, our type. When we sat down for drinks, the two boys told us they where starving as they hadn’t eaten yet so they where going to order food. We didn’t say it then, but both me and my friend thought it was weird, when you ask someone for drinks to come on an empty stomach and order a meal. We could also have planned a dinner then? Or they could have eaten before. Then they were looking through the menu and actually picking out food for each other, like a couple at a restaurant. They even actually ordered for each other when the waiter was at our table. At that point, I felt that my friend was actually my date and that those two lovebirds came together. My guy, ordered mussels and was slurping, licking and smacking super loud. Also, he was talking with food in his mouth. Totally gross. I tried giving some hints by asking him a couple of times with a specific tone if his food was good. Men simply don’t get hints, do they? Next to punctuality, good table manners are really important to me. After that eve, the boys asked us a couple of times to meet up again. We decided to let go of these boys, casually, by telling them an excuse each time after which contact cooled of.

My date is MIA
I was falling for a guy when he unexpectedly dumped me. I was mad, disappointed and wanted to get my mind of him. In a rage I signed up to the not so magical world of Tinder. Yes, been there, tried that and deleted it. I won’t ever use it again!
In between the swipe to the left and swipe to the right, I found this guy that looked really good! Dark hair, light eyes, and facial hair. We also had facebook friends in common so that gave an extra push. I swiped and apparently he had swiped too because we were a match. Yay! We did the basic small talk but quickly moved over to exchanging phone numbers. A plan was made to meet up. I suggested one of my fav places in town. I expected him to already be either outside waiting or inside. When he wasn’t out front, I decided to go in and look for a guy sitting by himself. No lonely boy at the bar. I decided to take a seat as I was punctual and he might be a tad late. The waiter came to ask my order and I told him I was waiting for someone so I didn’t want to order yet. He was officially 10 minutes late so I texted him to let him know I was there. No response. After 15 minutes I texted again and even gave him a call. Again, no response. After nearly 20 minutes, I decided that it had been enough and left, as smooth as possible as I was totally embarrassed. It felt like the walk of shame. I texted him: I’m out, fun meeting you. He almost instantly wrote back: ‘’Oh I fell asleep’’. No apology whatsoever. As for the sleeping part, let’s say it doesn’t seem legit, does it? I was stood up! He tried asking me out again but I politely declined, after which he decided to curse me out and call me all sorts of nasty names. So the moral of the story: Tinder is messed up.

avoiding-dating-single-funny-ecard

I hope you enjoyed reading about these date fails. Don’t forget, I’ts totally cool to be single 😉 Even Bridget Jones ends up getting married!

Advertenties